National Joke Day Competition - Closed

National Joke Day Competition - Closed

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Userlevel 1
It's sad, but all the good jokes about gas argon
Userlevel 1
I went to post some classical cds in a padded envelope. I told the missus I'd be Bach in a jiffy!!
Userlevel 1
How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You look for the fresh prints
Userlevel 1
Why did the baker have brown hands?
Because he kneeded a poo!
Userlevel 1
Whats the difference between a duck?

one of its legs are both the same
Userlevel 1

Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road. I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”

Userlevel 1
What did the German Policeman say to his tummy?
”You are under a vest!”
Userlevel 1
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus!
Userlevel 1
Why did the chicken cross the road?

to get to the idiots house.

Knock Knock

Who's there?

The chicken
Userlevel 1
What's invisible and smells like carrots?


Bunny Farts 🐇💨🥕
Userlevel 1
Two monkeys drawing a bath, one jumps in and says "ooh ah ah ah ah" the other says "put some cold in then!" 😁
Userlevel 2
A lady came into a bank and asked me to check her balanced, so I pushed her over.
Userlevel 1
Lad comes running in the room says " dad there's a man at the door with a bald head"....dad says "tell hom to go away son... I've already got one !"
Userlevel 4
Have you ever tried eating a clock? It’s very time consuming.
Userlevel 4
I told my son to stop playing Russian roulette, but you know how it is with kids... In one ear, out the other!
Userlevel 4
I went to the doctors recently
He said: “Don’t eat anything fatty”
I said: “What, like bacon and burgers?”
He said, “No. Fatty, don’t eat anything."
Userlevel 4
If you boil a funny bone does it become a laughing stock?
Userlevel 1
Why do orphans go to church?

its the only place they get to call anyone father
Userlevel 1
I decided to sell my vac as it was only collecting dust.
Userlevel 3
Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
Userlevel 1
What do you call a husband and wife who go fishing?
Rod and Annette
Userlevel 1
I got a new mobile phone for my wife.
Pretty awesome trade if you ask me!
Userlevel 1
What’s brass and sounds like Tom Jones?


Trombones
Userlevel 1
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one – and let the other one off
Userlevel 1
Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long ??
Because then it would be a foot 😂

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