Skip to main content
Blog

National Joke Day Competition.

National Joke Day Competition.
Did this article interest you or help you find an answer to your question?
71% found this helpful
Show first post
Don't miss out on the latest news and giveaways - learn how to opt-in!
This topic has been closed for comments

s27das
Active Contributor
  • Active Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
'Do not trust quotes you see on the Internet', Abraham Lincoln, 1862.

s27das
Active Contributor
  • Active Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
What's green, got six legs and if it jumped out of a tree, it would kill you?

A snooker table.

s27das
Active Contributor
  • Active Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
What's red and invisible?

No tomatoes.

Emmacwillingham
New
 Contributor
Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he wasn't peeling very well!

  • Active Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
Where do you find a tortoise with no legs?
—where you left it

  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
What do you call a woman who throws her bill on to the fire?

Bernadette!

  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
I said "how long will my spaghetti be?"

The waiter said "I don't know, we never measure it."

Kellywong
Active Contributor
  • Active Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
What did the guy say when he walked into a bar?
"Ouch!"

Mammy1
New
 Contributor
  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks: “Why the long face?” 🐴🤣

Pinkdahlia74
New
 Contributor
What did mommy corn say to baby corn??
wheres popcorn 😂

  • Active Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
Did you know you can now buy tomato sauce and baked beans online?

It's the benefit of Heinz site....

Jenmcdee123
New
 Contributor
  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
iD Mobile wrote:


What was humpty Dumpty wearing when he fell off the wall?
A shell suit 😂😂😂

Rickedd
New
 Contributor
  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
What do you call a star wars wookie who makes pots with clay and a magic wand?

Hairy Potter

Why do orphans go to church?

its the only place they get to call anyone father

  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
What do you call two men standing in the window?

Kurt and Rod

s27das
Active Contributor
  • Active Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
My wife says I should be more relaxed about unimportant details.

I'm starting tomorrow at 10:27:02 BST.

  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
How did the barber win the race?
He knew a shortcut.

What do you call a husband and wife who go fishing?
Rod and Annette

  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
My boss told me to have a good day,
So i went home.

  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?

Phillipe Flop

What do you call a Bee hive with no exits?


Unbelievable.

  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
My mum told me follow your dreams,
So i went back to bed.

  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
I got a new mobile phone for my wife.
Pretty awesome trade if you ask me!

Pete-ay
New
 Contributor
  • New
 Contributor
  • August 16, 2019
What’s brass and sounds like Tom Jones?


Trombones

Craigph89
New
 Contributor
  • New
 Contributor
  • 1 reply
  • August 16, 2019
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one – and let the other one off